Dear Date From Last Night
Dear Date From Last Night:
If it is our first date, and the entire time all through dinner, you are begging to see my underwear at the table, and I say no, and you continue to beg, I won’t want to go out with you again.
If I tell you that you are making me incredibly uncomfortable and you tell me what you are doing is completely normal, I will think you should be checked into a program at one of the Federal Universities.
If you call me a prude for not showing you my underwear at said table, on our first date, I will understand why you are 42 and never been married.
If, when we get up to leave, you are walking behind me, and lift up my dress all the way to my waist, unbeknownst to me, exposing my entire ass to the restaurant so you can look at my underwear, you should understand why I punched you. Just be thankful you still have your teeth.